Wednesday, December 18, 2013
Mom, I miss you very much. I took you for granted when you were here. I never thought a thing like that could actually happen. It was always the last thing I could ever even imagine. And now I have lost you, and I cannot make up for it. I cannot make up for anything I have said or done to you. I know I wasn't the best child, or the easiest to raise. And I am so sorry it. I wish I could go back now, and change everything! I would of traded you places in a heartbeat. I am glad I stuck by your side, nearly 24/7. I was there for you, as much as I would of wanted you there for me in a time like that.. I love you so much Mom. You were and still are my everything. Nobody can ever take your place, as much as they might like, they never will. YOU are my Mom. YOU WILL ALWAYS BE MY MOM. I will always continue to speak with you, as though you have never left. Even though it hurts so much not being able to actually hear your responses. I would enjoy so much as to know what you're thoughts are and were on so many different things. Somethings you just NEED a Mom's opinion. Your own Mom's opinions. I hate not having you here anymore. I miss you so much, I just cannot stand it sometimes. Sometimes, I just want to give up on life, and make the pain go away forever. And come be with you. But then I realize. That would be so selfish of me. Due to the fact, you got your life taken from you too early. Why would I want to purposely take my own? You are the only thing keeping me alive. That thought anyways. I love you so much. And I am just glad you are not in pain anymore. It killed me to see you go through what you did Mom. I would of traded you places in less than a heartbeat Mom... <3 I know you would do the same, if the same had happened to me, Shamen, Kass, Garrett... Well, any of the family pretty much. I love you, and I miss you so incredibly much. I cannot wait to see you again Mom... I love you. I will write you more notes, and give them to you, next time I'm in Springvulle. I haven't wrote any for a while.. I'm sorry. I love you. -Love your daughter, Chyote Anne.
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